


look at the stars, look how they shine for you...

by doujinbag



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Deaf Character, FLUFF EVERYWHERE OK, Fluff, Heterochromatic!eren, How do I tag these things, Light Angst, M/M, Making Love, Oneshot, deaf!eren, musician!Levi, yes the title is a coldplay reference shh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-29
Updated: 2015-01-29
Packaged: 2018-03-09 14:33:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3253295
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/doujinbag/pseuds/doujinbag
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Levi is a musician who performs at a small hole-in-the-wall café in the town of Shiganshina every Friday night. Eren is a shy boy who hates the color of his eyes and the condition of his ears but loves going to see Levi perform every week. When Levi notices and tries to strike up a conversation with him, he realizes Eren has been deaf all his life.<br/>So why is it that Eren is always so attentive at music shows he can't even hear?</p>
            </blockquote>





	look at the stars, look how they shine for you...

**Author's Note:**

> I am currently drowning in fics I need to update and write. Please send help. That's why this isn't going to be a continued chapter thing, just a super long oneshot. Forgive me. unu
> 
> For the record, yes, I decided to include heterochromatic!Eren in this. Because... who doesn't love the pretty multi-colored-eyes baby? (I'll give you a hint: Eren. Poor baby needs to be nicer to himself ;-; )
> 
> btw, with the way I wrote the beginning, you don't realize Eren is deaf until later on. Sorta on purpose, sorta not? Who knows. not me. idk what I'm doing with my life tbh
> 
> also please please please listen to the songs Levi sings in this. I feel like it's important to get the whole feel of the story? idk, I won't force you. but still:
> 
>  
> 
> [We Were Sparkling//My Brightest Diamond](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sqk1Ei0up60)
> 
>  
> 
> [Wonderwall//Oasis](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SLZ7uzFIMoY)
> 
>  
> 
> [Trust Me//The Fray](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=igJIABldKpk)
> 
>  
> 
> [Yellow//Coldplay](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i-n75KVcGsw)

_Are you sure you’ll be okay?_

_Yes, I’m fine._

_If you have any issues, please message me._

_I know, I will._

_Sasha is working tonight so she’s here if you need her. Please be safe._

_Okay. I’ll see you later._

Eren walked away from Mikasa and entered the small building alone, leaving his sister to do nothing but worry as she cautiously drove away. The sign in the window read SURVEY COFFEE in bold green letters, a small fluorescent _open_ sign blinking frantically underneath of it. This was, in fact, Eren’s favorite place to be.

As Eren walked inside, he waved a bit at Sasha, who was currently behind the counter making coffee for a customer. He knew his way around quite well by now, trotting back to the back section of the building. While the front served purpose as a café, the back housed a small wooden stage and microphones where many different people came to perform for different reasons. While most were talented musicians or people who liked to read and write slam poetry, sometimes even bored college kids would come in to put on idiotic skits instead of study for finals. But there was one man, one person in particular who came in every single Friday at exactly seven o’clock, always with his guitar hanging from his shoulder and a new song to play for the small audience. And this man was exactly the reason Eren spent every Friday night surrounded by quiet people and the aroma of coffee beans as opposed to watching TV with his slightly-too-worried sister.

The musician’s name was Levi, and he preferred to keep it at that. Eren wasn’t sure if it was a style thing (like Beyoncé, whose music Mikasa went crazy over back in tenth grade) or if Levi simply hated his surname, but whatever the reason, Eren didn’t really care nor mind. Eren knew his name was Levi, Levi, _Levi,_ and that was all that mattered.

The moment said musician walked onstage, Eren had to refrain from already smiling like a complete idiot. Eren knew very well that he was the only audience member who had stayed constant through all of Levi’s small shows, and all he could do was pray that he didn’t come across as creepy for that. The last thing he wanted was for yet another person to find him a freak for whatever reason.

“I’m Levi, as you may or may not already know,” the short man said, adjusting the microphone to reach his height, “and while I don’t have an original song tonight, I’m going to be covering one. It’s by the artist My Brightest Diamond and the song is _We Were Sparkling.”_ Levi paused to take a drink from the water bottle sitting on the wooden stool next to him. “Okay, yeah.” Levi was never great at introductions before he sang- or really before anything, for that matter- but he really couldn’t care less. He was there to play, hopefully get a little more recognition than he’d walked in with, and leave; it’s not like anyone gave half a shit about what he was saying, anyways. At least, that’s what he liked to think.

Eren kept his eyes glued to Levi’s mouth as he spoke, his hands lying flat on the table as the vibrations from the microphone-amplified sound traveled through the wooden tabletop and to his fingertips. As Levi began playing, he seemed focused on how he moved his fingers and that only. The minute he opened his mouth, he closed his eyes gently and let the lyrics flow freely from his mouth.

“There was a silver tree down by a river wide; that’s where we would go to hang our pretty things; and watch the wind blow-oh-oh…”

Eren watched Levi intently, leaning forward with his hands underneath his chin. There was no denying it; Eren greatly acknowledged the fact that Levi was a person very generously gifted by the universe with a very unique kind of beauty- his features looked to be chiseled out of stone and his eyes looked oddly frozen. Of course, his eyes weren’t as strange as Eren believed his own were, but there was still something behind them that drew Eren to want to come closer. Not that that’d ever happen; he doubted Levi had time to notice a silly little twenty-one year old who just happened to come to every show of his.

“…There used to be a tree where we took our pretty things; we’d hook them by a thread- golden egg, lipstick, and feathers; pieces of glass, chandelier baubles, and empty bottle of wine; and watch the light… shine… through…” Levi’s lips looked soft and gentle, yet still somehow firm each time they met on a “b” or “p” sound. He brought his mouth closer to the microphone as he whispered, _“I’m afraid to forget you.”_

Eren glanced down and smiled a bit to himself. He couldn’t help but think of how peaceful Levi looked as he sang, how his difficult, stone-cold demeanor fell away if only for a few minutes. He looked back up as Levi’s lips circled, drawing out long “ooh” sounds from his throat as his fingers plucked each guitar string carefully. Eren sighed and tapped his fingertips together as he found himself drifting into thought.

“I am remembering you…” Levi wasn’t controlling the song’s flow; the song’s flow was taking control over him. It was true that he very rarely felt at peace personally, but whenever he lost himself in music, he could breathe freely. “…you were sparkling.” The room filled with nothing but soft guitar and occasional “oh”s from Levi’s steady voice; once again, he had managed to put his audience in a trance. Eren didn’t need to hear the music to fall under Levi’s spell, as he smiled giddily just at his presence in the room.

Eren took the cue to clap when Levi’s hands stopped moving on the guitar, and soon others were applauding him as well. Levi silently thanked them before walking off the small stage, leaving Eren to admire only the image of Levi left imprinted behind his eyelids as he closed them. When he opened them again, he saw Sasha standing in the doorway that separated the parts of the building, grinning at him. _I know your little secret._

Eren blushed lightly and turned away for a second. It probably _was_ insanely obvious that he had a slight crush on the man- no, _slight_ was an inadequate word to use- but now that his cheeks were burning a shade of red that matched a firetruck, he felt like a bit of an overexcited little schoolgirl.

He stayed sitting at the table for a little while, hopefully awaiting Levi’s next song. He knew Levi always took relatively long breaks between each song, and he was always more than patient for him. He pulled a pen from his jean pocket and clicked it a few times before starting to doodle on a napkin. Nothing special, just simple swirls that intertwined with a pair of eyes- one shaded in and one not- and his name written in messy cursive. His personal doodle (Why did he even draw his own eyes so much? He honestly hated them.) melted into a new one. This time, a new pair of eyes was included. They were sharp and looked threatening, but the soft eyelashes and blush lines underneath them made the expression appear softer. Just as he finished swiping two long lines for the eyebrows, someone sat down across from him. Assuming it was Sasha, he didn’t bother looking up, but once a hand reached over into his view, he realized it was not in fact his friend, but _Levi._ Eren scrambled around nervously, shoving the pen and napkin into his pocket quickly.

“There’s no need to look so scared, kid,” Levi said. “I just asked what you were doing.”

Eren stared at Levi with his eyes glimmering in fear a bit, biting his lip and tapping his foot on the ground repeatedly out of anxiety. “I…” Eren stopped himself. He didn’t understand what Levi just said to him.

“Are you all right? You look like you just saw a ghost. I know I’m grossly pale, but I promise, I’m breathing, “ Levi tried to joke. “Did you like the show?” Eren nodded quietly, staring down at his hands. “I’ve noticed you’ve been coming to all of them. I appreciate it. Good on my whole ‘failing musician’ ego,” Levi snorted.

Eren didn’t respond. Not because he was trying to be rude, but simply because he didn’t hear a word Levi just said.

Simply because he _couldn’t_ hear a word Levi just said.

Soon enough, as if Sasha was a mind reader sent by God himself, she walked on over to their table, wiping her hands on her apron awkwardly. “Hi,” she greeted Levi. “Ah… uhm… Eren!” She looked at the boy, making motions with her hands as she spoke. “Do you want me to transla-”

“N-no,” Eren squeaked, immediately feeling more self conscious than he already was. He looked over at Levi who was merely giving a confused stare. “I- I mean… yes. Yes.”

Sasha turned to Levi with a sigh. “Levi, right? Hi. I’m Sasha. This is Eren, and I really hope you weren’t planning on asking to bone him or something because A, his sister would probably have your head, B, the kid’s more of a virgin than Mother Mary, and C, he can’t hear you.”

Levi laughed at the “virgin” part, but Eren didn’t understand what Sasha just said. She spoke too fast to read her lips. He sighed in defeat and tugged on Sasha’s sleeve, getting her attention to sign to her. _Tell him I’m sorry._

_Why are you sorry?_

_For not hearing him._

_Don’t apologize, that’s dumb._

_I don’t care. Tell him anyways._

Sasha sighed sadly and said, “He says he’s sorry. For… not being able to hear you. He’s… been deaf since he was a baby.”

Levi’s expression fell a bit. “Why is he sorry? That’s not something he can help. Tell him not to be sorry.”

“I did.”

Levi squinted at Eren and shook his head. “Don’t be sorry,” he said slowly. “You’re okay.” Eren was able to read his lips perfectly fine, which made him smile. So he _didn’t_ find him a freak. This was off to a good start, he thought. Levi said something to Sasha, which she giggled at.

 _What is it?_ Eren signed, a bit frustrated.

_He says he likes your eyes. That he’s never seen anything like them before. That they’re pretty._

Eren gasped silently, his eyes widening at Levi. “Pre’y?” Eren said, missing the T’s. Levi nodded, concealing a smile behind his hand. Sasha disappeared before Eren could sign to her, but quickly returned, two cups of coffee in her hands. “It’s on me,” she told them, signing it to Eren. “I have to get back to work, but… I’m sure you two can manage.” She smiled and motioned for them to write with an ink pen before walking away. Eren cheeks were left absolutely bright pink, like the kind of color you find in an obnoxiously blinding highlighter. But Eren wasn’t obnoxious nor a highlighter, and it actually looked cute on his face. He pulled his pen out of his pocket, clicking it a few times before grabbing a napkin, hiding his face shyly as he wrote.

 _Hi._ He passed it to Levi, but not before adding a miniscule smiley face next to the word. He gave Levi the pen and Levi looked at him, furrowing his eyebrows as he thought of what to write.

_That Sasha girl tries to be a bit of a matchmaker or something, doesn’t she? She asked If I wanted to bone you._

Eren snorted, but held back his laugh, eyes stinging in embarrassment. He hated his voice. He couldn’t even hear it, but he knew it didn’t sound “normal”, which made his insides squirm in anxiety. All his life, all he ever wanted to be was _normal._ But between the fact he couldn’t hear, his eyes were two completely different colors, and he hadn’t exactly mastered the whole “social” thing, he knew he was far from it and always would be. Levi quickly scribbled under his previous statement at seeing Eren’s shyness.

_Don’t hide your laugh._

Eren shook his head. _It’s hideous,_ he wrote.

 _If it matches your face, it’s gotta be ~~cute~~ nice, _ Levi replied. Eren noticed the scratched out “cute” and bit his lip. Oh, lord. He was crushing on Levi _hard,_ and there he was, calling him _cute?_

 _You don’t have to say that just to make me feel better, you know,_ Eren wrote with a quick hand.

 _I’m not. I’m telling the truth._ Levi picked up his coffee at that, taking a long sip of it. Eren decided against commenting on the odd way Levi held his mug; he didn’t want to put Levi on the spot for a simple habit he had. _Can I ask you a question?_ Levi wrote again, coffee still in his hand. Eren merely nodded in response. _Why do you keep coming to my shows if you can’t hear the songs?_

Eren might as well have morphed into a tomato right then and there. He squeaked a bit and hid his face behind his hands, shaking his head. “I-!”

 _I’m sorry. That was probably really insensitive to ask,_ Levi wrote grimly.

 _It’s not that,_ Eren finally responded after a moment with a shaky hand. _I… guess I just like seeing you. And… idk. I’m so awkward, I’m sorry._

Levi’s eyes softened and he moved as if he was going to take the pen from Eren’s hand again, but instead put his hand directly on Eren’s in a soothing motion. “You’re not awkward,” he said slowly. “That’s cute.”

Eren let out a giggle, wanting to slap himself for it immediately. “Not.”

Levi nodded. “It is.” _So is that giggle,_ he wrote. _Fucking adorable, Jesus Christ. I’d tell you to stop but I don’t want you to._

Eren shook his head. “You… making me blush.” He pronounced “blush” like “bluss” but either way, it was utterly adorable. _Do you want to get coffee sometime?_ Eren scrawled on the napkin.

 _Aren’t we already?_ Levi smirked, pointing to their mugs. Eren put his hand on his forehead and groaned. He felt like an absolute idiot. _Hey, don’t worry. You’re cute. You look tired anyways, I don’t blame you for missing it._

Little to Levi’s knowledge, Eren didn’t mess up for the fact that he was tired. He messed up because every time he saw Levi, his stomach did this weird little thing he couldn’t exactly describe. What was that saying he’d read in a book once before? _Butterflies in your stomach?_ It felt like that, like a million little butterflies were flapping their wings rapidly inside his intestines and everywhere else, for that matter.

 _I’ve gotta go play my next song, but after that, I’ll talk to you as much as you want. Is that okay?_ Levi asked, the pen accidentally ripping the napkin a bit as he wrote the question mark. Eren nodded and smiled at him, his eyes shimmering in the dim lighting of the café.

With that, Levi stood up and walked back onstage, pulling his guitar back around himself and messing with a few strings. He turned the mic on again and, despite the fact Eren couldn’t hear him, it almost felt as if whatever he was saying was directed at him.

“Anyway, here’s _Wonderwall.”_

\---

Over the course of the next few weeks, Eren noticed that Levi smiled abnormally more whenever he sang and after a few times, even admitted he had tried learning a bit of sign language but failed. _I don’t have the patience, sadly,_ he’d told Eren. _I really wish I can force myself to sit down and learn though. I want to talk to you more easily._

Eren didn’t know whether or not to consider their Friday night rendezvous dates or not, but secretly, he liked to tell himself that they were.

Mikasa eventually brought herself to observe one of their meets from afar, and much to Eren’s pleasant surprise, she approved of Eren hanging out with the musician. It wasn’t often that Mikasa let Eren get too close to people who could be a potential threat, and so Eren nearly squealed and jumped for joy when she expressed her approval.

One cold October night, about a month after their first conversation in the café, Levi opted on driving Eren home himself, and Eren couldn’t have been happier. As they walked down the sidewalk together, Levi held his guitar case in one of his hands and let his other one swing freely, just barely grazing Eren’s fingertips with his own. Once they reached Levi’s car, he shoved the case in the backseat and opened the passenger door for Eren, closing it safely behind him once Eren was inside. Eren felt special, and for the first time in his life, it was meant in a _good_ way. He pulled his seatbelt across him and looked to his side as Levi got in, starting up the car immediately. Levi winced and reached over to turn down the radio, nearly apologizing before he realized Eren couldn’t understand that the volume was blasted all the way up. He laughed a bit at it, making Eren raise an eyebrow.

 _What are you laughing at?_ Eren asked on paper. He had stopped using napkins and bought himself an actual notebook to make life a hell of a lot easier on the both of them.

_Volume was up all the way. I wanted to apologize but then realized… yeah._

Levi was afraid Eren might get offended by it, but after a silent moment, Eren burst into full-fledged laughter. It was the first time Levi had ever heard Eren laugh like that in all the weeks they’d been talking. And this time, Eren didn’t even bother apologizing for it. He merely laughed and laughed until tears were in his eyes, holding his sides as the laughter just kept rolling.

Levi started laughing too, smiles permanently glued to both their faces as they sat there like third graders going through a hysteric episode. Eren kept laughing as Levi drove him home, where he knew Mikasa would most likely be waiting with a gun in hand if he returned Eren too late. Once he arrived in front of the little house, he turned the car off and turned to Eren.

“You’re cute,” he said, reaching over to him. Taking the notebook, he wrote in very large letters, _I absolutely adore your laugh._

_I absolutely adore you._

Eren’s laughter died down as he read it, sucking in a breath. He looked back up at Levi and set the notebook and pen down in his lap, and by the time he regained his breath, he lost it once again and Levi’s lips pressed softly to his. Eren was a virgin, but he had tons of kissing experience from his more “experimental days” as a teenager. His best friend Armin had actually been his first kiss, but it’d been more of a silly teen thing than anything. He’d never had feelings for Armin that went beyond platonic, but with Levi…

…with Levi it all felt just _right._

He placed his hand on Levi’s cheek to hold onto the kiss a bit longer, Levi’s hand softly resting on Eren’s waist. Their lips moved gently in sync, Eren’s hand traveling up from Levi’s cheek to rest in his hair, fingers brushing against the man’s undercut. Levi needed a haircut, or so he said, but Eren liked his hair the way it was. It was like a signature look. He’d be famous for it one day, he’d told Levi once.

When Eren finally pulled away, he bit his lip, smiling to himself in the dark of the car. “Than’ you,” he murmured before hopping out of the car, practically floating down the driveway as he ran to his house in absolute happiness.

And oh, Levi was falling, falling, absolutely _falling_ for the boy. He couldn’t think of one thing he didn’t like about him. Every time those absolutely surreal eyes of Eren’s looked into Levi’s, the Earth stopped turning for a second. Levi was tempted to compare them to gemstones, but he hated clichés and that was most definitely a terrible one. Nevertheless, there was no denying that Eren’s right eye strongly resembled an emerald and his left looked like topaz. They were definitely superior to Levi’s cold stone-like eyes, with no glimmer or light left in them.

Well, maybe when he was around Eren, they shone just a little brighter.

\---

Friday nights at the café led to post-café dates in Levi’s apartment, where Eren was shocked to find that the man owned a cat. He was tempted to refer to it as Levi Jr., due to its black hair, menacing expression, and cold scoff every time he approached it, but Levi shrugged and explained he hadn’t named the cat. Eren insisted Levi Jr. was a good name for it. Levi laughed and kissed him more.

One night, as they curled up on Levi’s bed together with the blanket draped over them, Levi tapped Eren’s shoulder. They had left the notebook out in the living room, so Eren tried his best to read Levi’s lips.

“I finally taught myself the alphabet in sign language,” Levi said. “Can I show you?”

While Eren didn’t make out every single word, he got what he was saying and nodded enthusiastically. Levi pointed to himself and his hand flicked in the motions to spell out L-E-V-I, and then he pointed to Eren to spell E-R-E-N.

Eren smiled proudly and threw his arms around Levi, kissing his cheek enthusiastically. “Good!” he exclaimed. “Good, good, good.”

He rested his head on Levi’s chest and sighed, curling up and listening to the steady pattern of Levi’s heartbeat. Levi folded his fingers together with Eren’s and kissed his hair, rubbing his thumb over the back of Eren’s hand. It had been another month and a half since their first kiss, and they were proud to use the word _boyfriend_ to refer to each other. There wasn’t a moment that Eren didn’t feel absolutely blessed by whatever entity that might exist for Levi’s presence in his life, and Levi shared the same exact feelings. They were hopelessly, madly in love with each other, but neither of them had the guts to admit that L-word.

As they sat in peaceful silence for the next few moments, the last thing Levi expected was for Eren to start crying. He didn’t understand what was happening. “Eren?” he said, despite knowing he couldn’t hear him. He looked at his face and saw tears streaming down Eren’s cheeks, his entire body shaking as he wept. “Eren, what’s wrong? What happened?” Levi was talking too fast and there were too many tears in Eren’s eyes for him to even try and attempt to read his lips.

“All I wan’- is to hear- your voice,” Eren cried, his broken-pitched voice sounding even more off than normal due to his sobbing. “And I- can’t have tha’. I’m sorry. I’m sorry I’m me-e, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, Le-Levi.”

Levi held Eren close, trying to calm him down to his best ability. He didn’t know what suddenly set this off, but he didn’t bother questioning it. He wiped the tears from Eren’s beautiful eyes and kissed each of his eyelids softly. He shook his head, expressing his disagreement with Eren’s words. Although he didn’t know how to actually sign _beautiful,_ he spelled it out, hoping Eren would understand. “You’re beautiful,” he mouthed clearly. “I would never trade you for the world.” He kissed him softly and continued wiping the tears away, feeling an ache in his chest at seeing Eren so upset. “You’re perfect,” he whispered. And, although Eren didn’t realize Levi was talking once he buried his face in his shirt, Levi said out loud, “I love you.”

He was the first one to admit it, despite the other not ever knowing.

\---

It was almost Christmas when they had their first fight. All night, Eren had been questioning why Levi even liked him (he almost said _loved,_ but quickly decided against it), which only led to nonverbal yelling. If that was even a thing.

By the end of an hour, Eren’s notebook had pages filled up with large, angry handwriting from the both of them.

Levi: _What the hell makes you think I wouldn’t like you?_

Eren: _You can do better._

Levi: _What is better? Eren, you’re perfect. Please don’t be so insecure._

Eren: _I’m not being insecure. I’m telling you that there are a million people better than me. People who can actually talk to you for real._

Levi: _You think I can do better simply because you’re deaf?_

Eren: _I don’t “think” so. I know._

Levi: _That’s stupid. That’s stupid, Eren. I can’t do better than you. You don’t even understand how insanely amazing you make me feel. Stop saying bad things about yourself, just stop._

Eren: _I’m telling the truth._

Levi: _You’re acting like you WANT to break up. Is that what you want?_

Eren didn’t respond to that. He didn’t even pick up the pen.

Levi: _That IS what you want then, isn’t it? I knew it. You know what, fine. Fine. If you hate being with me so much, just go._

Eren stared at the notebook with burning eyes before snatching it up and walking out of Levi’s apartment, a tear slipping out from his gold eye before they were soon falling from both. As he walked outside, texting Mikasa to tell her to come pick him up, he couldn’t even catch his breath. It was too much, it was all too much for him to deal with.

He sat down on a small pile of hardened snow off the side of the road and put his head in his hands, not realizing Mikasa was there until she tapped his shoulder. He looked up at his sister with a messy face and she immediately hugged him, rage burning in her face. _I’ll kill him if he hurt you,_ she signed to Eren.

 _Don’t._ Eren shook his head, trying his best to calm down. _None of this is his fault._

A month passed without any form of communication between the two. Eren had known absolute quietness for all twenty-one years of his life, but this was the first time it was painfully silent. When his mom died, at least he could feel some noise bubbling on the inside of his veins. When his father ran off, at least he could hear the rage swirling around inside his mind. But now, all that remained was an empty silence that drained him of everything. He’d never felt like this before over anyone. He didn’t know what to make of that.

Finally, a few weeks after the new year, Eren convinced Mikasa to drop him off at the café again one particularly cold Friday night. _If anything goes wrong, I mean it when I say I’ll strangle him,_ Mikasa reminded Eren. _Good luck._

Eren walked inside anxiously, and the minute he saw Sasha, she raced over to him. _I haven’t seen you in here in a while. I heard about what happened with you and Levi. I’m sorry._

Eren merely shook his head. _Don’t worry about it._

The short few steps he took to enter the back room of the café was probably the longest walk he’d ever taken in his life. The minute he sat down in his usual spot, he had to take about five minutes to calm himself down. Why was he even here? What was his goal? What did he think was going to happen?

He didn’t know. He just hoped _something_ would happen to stop the hurting.

He almost lost it the minute Levi walked onstage. He didn’t feel like he should be there. He tried to hide his face from view, but Levi had already spotted him. And neither of them knew what to fucking _do_.

Levi gave Eren a break. He pretended he didn’t see him, his eyes completely hardening over into dark marbles as he focused on getting the microphone ready. “I have another cover for you all tonight,” he said, his tone a bit cold but feeling like it was more hurt than anything. “So… here we go, I guess.”

Despite Eren not knowing what Levi was singing, he could simply feel the fact that the song was most definitely not a joyful one. Sasha gave Eren a sad look through the doorway of the building, signing, _He’s singing about you, Eren._

Levi’s fingers moved slowly over the guitar as he sang, “Looking for something I’ve never seen; alone and I’m in between; the place that I’m from and the place that I’m in; a city I’ve never been… I found a friend, or should I say a foe; said there’s a few things you should know. We don’t want you to see; we come and we go; here today, gone tomorrow…”

Levi’s expression was beyond sad. It was rather full of regret and absolute _sorrow._ “We’re only taking turns, holding this world… It’s how it’s always been; when you’re older, you will understand.”

He sighed away from the microphone and continued playing, trying his best to keep his eyes down and not at all in Eren’s direction. On one particular line in the second verse, Eren saw Sasha translating what it said to him. _“You need me less than I need you.”_ Eren felt like he’d just been punched in the throat at that. When Levi reached the second chorus, he held out the last note as if his life depended on it. “When you’re older, you will under- _stand-!”_

His hands moved over the guitar with passion, with force, like he was pouring out his entire heart through his fingertips. “And again, maybe you _don’t…_ And again, maybe you _won’t…”_

When Levi finally got to the very end of the song, the guitar was back to being soft and slow and quiet, as was his voice when he whisper-sang, “When you’re older, you might understand.” He walked offstage without a “thank you”, but still, everyone clapped for him.

Everyone except Eren, that is.

As everyone returned to their conversations, or reading, or coffee, or whatever the hell it was they were doing, Eren put his head down in his arms and started to _cry._ He could only understand the parts Sasha had transcribed for him from afar, but that was all he needed to hate himself. Why did he break up with Levi over such a stupid insecurity? He needed Levi- he _wanted_ him in his life more than he’d ever wanted anything. And he screwed it up because he felt stupidly insecure over his _hearing_.

“Eren.” Levi knew Eren wouldn’t hear him, but feeling his name on his lips again made him feel better. He stood by Eren’s table and stared down at the quietly crying boy before sliding in to sit across from him. He reached over and touched his hand, which made Eren jerk his head up immediately.

“Levi?” Eren said weakly, pronouncing the “i” in Levi’s name with a hasty breath.

Levi reached over and wiped Eren’s eyes for him, frowning solemnly. “Don’t cry,” he mouthed to him. “Don’t cry.”

Eren got up and threw his arms around Levi, burying his face in the crook of his neck. “I-I’m so’ry,” he said, intending to whisper but of course, it came out louder than he wanted it to.

“Shh. Shh.” Levi turned and stood up, hugging Eren tightly. He kissed his forehead and brought a pen out of his own pocket, taking a napkin out of the napkin holder at the end of the table. He quickly scribbled down a message, not taking his arms away from Eren once. _Do you want to get out of here?_ it read.

 _What about the rest of your show?_ Eren replied.

 _Don’t worry about it. I’m sure everyone can survive,_ Levi wrote back. Eren waited a second before nodding, taking Levi by the hand and quickly pulling him out of there. Levi didn’t even bother with his guitar case; he didn’t _care_ at the moment. Besides, he could get it the next day, or the day after that… or whenever he felt like it, really.

Eren quickly signed to Sasha, telling her to let Mikasa know he was going home with Levi. Sasha nodded and grinned at him, making a small heart with her fingers and sticking her tongue out. Eren rolled his eyes and just kept walking until he and Levi were outside, feet crunching against the fallen snow on the sidewalk. It was starting to snow harder now, and he couldn’t complain whatsoever. He absolutely loved snow.

Once they were in Levi’s car, Eren couldn’t contain his excitement. He was okay, they were okay, Levi didn’t hate him and Eren was _in love._ His hands were itching to travel all over Levi’s body, but he knew it had to wait until they were back at Levi’s apartment. And when they finally were, Eren didn’t hold back.

Levi unlocked his apartment, and once they were inside, he threw his keys aside and picked Eren up, wrapping his legs around his waist as they kissed probably more passionately than they ever had. Eren kept his arms around Levi’s neck and let Levi carry him into the bedroom, almost refusing to break their lips apart for even a single second.

Eren was a huge ball of nervousness to say the least. He was simply trying to follow Levi’s lead, and he couldn’t help but laugh his anxiety out as he accidentally hit Levi in the face with his shirt when he took hit off. And Levi still loved Eren’s laugh more than any sound in the world. Eren’s breaths were fast and shaky, and his hands fidgeted all over Levi’s body. He was still _very_ much a virgin, but he trusted in Levi to take good care of him, so his fears didn’t last long. Levi took his sweet time kissing all over Eren’s chest, neck, and really anywhere he could get his mouth on. He loved everything about the boy, every little inch of skin on his body, and he didn’t leave one spot untouched.

Eren slid his hands under Levi’s shirt and traced his fingers delicately over Levi’s carefully defined abdomen, then slid Levi’s shirt over his head and threw it to the side. He didn’t hit him in the face this time, thankfully. He giggled quietly as he pulled Levi back into another kiss, deep and slow and full of the love they both felt but hadn’t knowingly admitted quite yet.

Eren ran his hands up and down Levi’s back repeatedly as Levi’s tongue dove into his mouth, grazing against his softly. As their lips moved together in perfect sync, Eren wrapped his legs around Levi’s hips, toes pointing upward in the air.

Levi pulled away from the kiss and brushed Eren’s hair from his eyes. “Are you sure?” he mouthed slowly. It took Eren a second to understand what he was saying before nodding, his hands going up into Levi’s hair.

“Yes,” he whispered back boldly.

For the next hour or so, Levi was rather shocked. He had never heard such noises from Eren, but here he was, drawing these long moans from his lips like it was the last thing he was ever going to do. He didn’t even know Eren was _capable_ of making those kinds of sounds.

He found a new sound that he loved more than Eren’s laugh.

Levi kept his mouth glued to Eren’s neck, holding his waist as he moved their hips together. He left mark upon mark all over Eren’s neck, collar, upper chest, and some even on his shoulders. Eren didn’t mind at all; he saw each purplish spot as another thing to define him as Levi’s. Good thing it was sweater season, otherwise he knew Mikasa would have both their heads on a silver plate.

He almost laughed when Levi’s breath tickled his neck, but it soon turned into another moan as Eren’s body filled with pleasure from all of Levi’s motions. They both ended up climaxing together, beads of sweat trailing over their foreheads and their mouths both hanging open in large “O” shapes.

When they came down from their tipping points, Eren caught his breath and held onto Levi tightly. He knew they needed to take a shower, but surprisingly, even his clean freak of a boyfriend didn’t bother pointing it out. Levi simply held Eren close to his chest, kissing his forehead softly and being extremely gentle with him. After a while of quiet bliss, Levi brought Eren to look at him. His hands shook with nervousness as he bit his lip, staring into Eren’s gorgeous technicolor eyes. He had finally gained the patience he’d been needing for a while and had figured out how to sign something aside from the letters of the alphabet.

Eren gasped silently as he watched Levi’s hand form the sign for _I love you._ He hugged Levi tightly and kissed him as passionately as he still could. “I lo’e you too,” he said. Levi’s eyes lit up and he held Eren’s hand tightly, not even bothering to get up for a shower for a long time.

They fell asleep after a while, not letting go of each other even once.

\---

Eren soon fell back into his regular pattern of never once missing any of Levi’s shows, but now, he always arrived with Levi instead of meeting him there. In fact, there were rarely any instances in which he wasn’t spending time with Levi. Every day, Eren taught Levi a little more sign language, Levi’s patience be willing. And every day, Eren fell just a little deeper into love with him.

One particular day, Levi wrote a message to Eren to let him know that the lyrics to the song he was covering were very special, and if there was any way he could figure them out, it’d be fantastic. Sasha happily obliged to translate the song for Eren, and that’s how Eren found himself sitting across from his friend one Friday as Levi anxiously greeted the audience. Eren was completely attentive, his hands lying flat on the tabletop and his eyes darting from Sasha to Levi as he waited for Levi to begin playing.

And finally, he did.

Eren smiled as he felt the soft vibrations in the table of Levi’s guitar strumming. The minute Levi began singing, Eren watched Sasha carefully to see what Levi was saying. The song was very cute and metaphorical, seeming to use the color yellow to represent… happiness, perhaps? He always considered yellow to be a happy color.

Finally, as Levi sang one certain line, he pointed subtly to Eren. Eren’s face couldn’t have possibly expressed any more happiness as Sasha giddily converted the lyrics to motions.

_You know I love you so._

_You know I love you so._

**Author's Note:**

> [tumblr](http://spookymileskane.tumblr.com) / [instagram](http://instagr.am/and.a.smile)


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